Satyre

2008-07-14T22:11:00.000+05:30

Nobody Would Listen To you When You Pontificate...

... but they gladly will abandon themselves to you when you give them little glimpses of themselves; such vanity.

2008-07-08T19:20:00.000+05:30

Holmesian

I guess I'd rather be a Mycroft than a Sherlock ...

?
:)

2008-06-26T21:08:00.000+05:30

Not So Obvious

Acting the part versus playing it ...

2008-06-12T07:34:00.000+05:30

Late Discovery

Phish

2008-05-30T20:23:00.000+05:30

If you have a right, you most certainly do not have to exercise it.

2008-04-26T11:24:00.000+05:30

On Complexity

Why is it counterintuitive to realise that the more you refine, the more you randomise?

2008-04-21T08:41:00.000+05:30

There is a Difference ...

... between vanity and pride. It is just that those who are vain are oblivious to it.

2008-04-18T18:16:00.000+05:30

"The Worst Mistake In The History Of The Human Race"

I find it difficult to disagree. Read ...

2008-04-14T10:44:00.000+05:30

The Futility of It All

After the kind of discussion ( ? ) that one had last evening / night / this morning, one feels compelled to muse over the possibility that literacy is nothing but a style statement for those blessed with a lack of imagination.

2008-04-10T19:59:00.000+05:30

Confession

I must admit to being bilateral and bicameral apart from being bipolar, of course.

Read This

2008-04-01T18:13:00.000+05:30

Deluge

Would we not be better informed if we had less of opinion floating around?

2008-03-31T21:29:00.000+05:30

Be Prepared ...

... to not ask questions if you are not willing to act judge.

~ On Judgement

2008-03-30T18:11:00.000+05:30

Bubble Bauble III by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Sol V by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008-03-24T17:29:00.000+05:30

It Gets On My Nerves ...

... when people who can lay no legitimate claim to being the possessors of any rudimentary form of gray matter, try and capitalise on it. Use it, that is.

?
:D
~ Just one of those days, I guess.

2008-03-10T20:11:00.000+05:30

On Bureaucracy

I am willing to accept change as long as as you are prepared to work for it.

That's the best of us. No?

2008-03-09T19:46:00.001+05:30

Neon Blush by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008-03-09T19:46:00.000+05:30

Golden Eye by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008-02-22T20:31:00.000+05:30

2008-02-21T19:17:00.000+05:30

On Opinion

Opinion is like your sexuality, valuable as long as you keep it to yourself. Expressing it is akin to Pornography. And fighting for the right to express it is nothing more than the argument to legalise prostitution.

2008-02-20T19:20:00.000+05:30

Should We Blame Our Education System For ...

... the fact that we choose to be oblivious to all the negatives / impossibilities / tradeoffs in what we desire and stay critically vigilant to the same in what we choose to despise?

Edit : On more pleasant days, I would be more charitable and accord to the average human the acumen of a blinkered horse.

2008-02-16T18:34:00.000+05:30

Copper and Silver by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008-02-16T17:24:00.000+05:30

Fictive Exercise : When the Levee Breaks

0900h : The alarm triggered it. Or so he would have liked to believe. Just that he knew better. For worse. He swung across the bed and shut it off. The band across hiis forehead tensed itself. Taut. He was coming apart. He put his head between his kneees and whimpered. To cut off the tension. To no avail. It just would not happen. And he knew that too.

0915h : Managed to glug down a glass of water. His mouth had a bitter raspiness. Dry. Needed to scream. To bawl his guts out. Just could not. The band tightened itself. And he ceased to exist. Fractured. Dismembered. Disembodied.

0930h : Reached across and into the drawer where he had been getting them together. From the same dealer. He could not care less. In fact, at times he had half hoped that the fellow would ask a few questions. He never did. Needed that something which could finally tip him over the edge to oblivion. It was just so damn easy. The end of the agony that was this existence. He had four of them. Knew how to use one, of course. But he did not have it in himself to will it. It did not matter if it was cowardice of a different sort, he could not. Looked around the room dully. No. He could not. Replaced them in the drawer.

1000h : The room was ordered now. Some reassurance it was. The same drills. Day in Day out. To keep it at bay. He was afraid to feel, for fear of what it did to him. Was it possible to feel so much that it turned into a keening banshee in his head? He never knew otherwise. How long could he go back running into his corner? Breathe - he told himself. Numbed himself and muted the caterwauling. Dull and dazed.

1030h : He had stopped taking the pills. Not that they were unavailable or he could ill-afford them. The sheer act of popping them by himself sapped hiim of all will. Not any more. He just could not. Not for himself. Not for anyone else. Put the bottle back in its place. Flopped back on the bed. Too tired to live and too fatigued to kill himself.

1100h : The knock on the door awoke him. He would have cursed but could not do that either today. What was different about the day? This day. It was his neighbour. Wanted a little help moving some furniture around. Old man lived alone. Seemed well-adjusted and friendly. He made sure he returned the favour of demeanour. Helped out. Got back to his room.

1200h : Fixed himself a salad sandwich. Gagged on the first bite that he took. Carefully deposited it into the kitchen's wastebin. The semblance of order compensated for the disarray that was him. Maybe there was some method in his madness after all. The thought was not new. He smiled sardonically nevertheless. Shook his head. And it returned.

1300h : Flopped about in bed for three quarters of an hour. Listless. All at sea. It was getting worse. Walked back to the drawer. Fumbled with the magazines as he loaded them. Maybe now it would happen.

1400h : It did not. Crazy. Yes, this was what it was like. It did not matter how you acquired it. This was it and this was all he knew. The worse it got the calmer and more subdued his demeanour. Practice makes Pretence Perfect. Tell that to the void within. Put one of them in a guitar case. The semi-automatic. There was no particular reason for acquiring it. Or wait, was it presentiment? He had always been prescient that way. Or so he would like to believe. He grinned. Groaned. Something had to give way. Please. Today. Now. His heart started pounding as he dressed in the trenchcoat and cap. Hands trembled as he stuffed three into his pockets and clasped the case in his hand. Started walking.

1500h : He had been walking around for an hour now. Hoped he would exhaust himself. There was a nervous edge to his faculties. Shied away from passers'-by eyes. He had ended up at the university campus. Knew there would be some gathering or the other at the Hall. He had sat amongst some earlier in his time there. The faces swam into focus. Their othernesses. The palpable lack of agony at existence. The need to hold onto it. The instinct he never had. He knew it was a divide that could not be bridged.

... Heartbeats mounting he went across to the back. He heard the animated voices. And the band closed in on itself. He could not breathe. Stepped across from around the stage. The professor stared at him. He whimpered again. Within. To himself. Cast a lowered eye around. Pulled them out. One by one. Emptied the lot. Aimlessly and yet aiming at the otherness. The multitudes that swamped and annihilated him. Clips emptied themselves. Something must give way ...

It did. The band snapped as he put the last one to his temple. He began to smile, only to pull the trigger before he did.

Annnihilation. Exorcism. Oblivion.

~ Inspired in part by the comments on this report. Also do read Stephen King's commentary here.

Blurb : He killed them because they wanted to live. He killed them because he wanted to die.

2008-01-27T08:01:00.000+05:30

Magellanic II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008-01-16T10:14:00.000+05:30

Psychosis

Is this 'a dialogue between mankind and nature', as Prigogine says? Well, yes, in the same kind of weird way as in all our representations of the world. A dialogue between the silent performer in a game of Dumb Crambo and his team, as I suggested before. Or between a ventriloquist and his doll, perhaps, where the doll has a mind of its own and feels free to mock the ventriloquist- but can do it only in so far as the ventriloquist puts the words in its mouth. Between Hamlet and the Ghost, where the incorporeal figment of Hamlet's uneasy imagination tells him things he did not know - but can do it only in the words that Hamlet imagines for him.

- Michael Frayn, The Human Touch.

2008-01-12T08:05:00.000+05:30

Blue Note by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008-01-08T20:18:00.000+05:30

Submerged Gold by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

There is nothing wrong with being young and idealistic. Just that when you are young and idealistic, you are often wrong.

2008-01-04T13:46:00.000+05:30

Since there was some confusion ( not that it matters ),

~ Astigmatix = WillOTheWisp

2008-01-02T20:27:00.000+05:30

No Man is an I's Land

Heh. Heh.

2007-12-31T21:33:00.000+05:30

Clouded Moebius by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2008

2007-12-31T17:31:00.000+05:30

Spiral Out by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Doing this was eminently satisfying ....

2007-12-27T13:00:00.000+05:30

Cusp of the Sea and the Sky II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-24T07:43:00.000+05:30

Pellucid by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-24T07:00:00.000+05:30

Psy I : Tunnel Vision by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-23T16:35:00.000+05:30

Attack of the Dust Mites by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-23T10:19:00.000+05:30

Force Field Inversion by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-22T18:20:00.000+05:30

Close Shaves

Been tending to nick oneself daily, learning to use Occam's Razor ...

2007-12-21T21:59:00.001+05:30

Whimsy by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-21T21:59:00.000+05:30

Voodoo Chile by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-21T21:58:00.000+05:30

String Theory by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-21T21:57:00.000+05:30

The Whimsy Series

Invitation to My Funeral by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-21T05:03:00.000+05:30

Vesuvius by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-20T18:03:00.000+05:30

Reflection by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-20T17:57:00.000+05:30

The Devil's Reef by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Just finished reading Seth Lloyd's Programming the Universe. Summarily speaking, it was enjoyable; especially the treatment of Entropy and Quantum Entanglement alongwith that of Decoherence. However, towards the end when all of these subjects could have been tied together effectively into a whole, it gets all unravelled. There isn't a problem with what is being stated; but with the author's, probably unavoidable, economy of metaphor and analogy. You put it aside with a "So What?!"

Also started Hans Christian Baeyer's Information.

2007-12-20T07:44:00.000+05:30

Above by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-20T07:37:00.000+05:30

Flight by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-20T07:15:00.000+05:30

Blaze Away by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-18T23:07:00.000+05:30

Nihilis Redux by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-18T22:57:00.000+05:30

Nihilis by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-18T22:46:00.000+05:30

Libido by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-17T21:15:00.000+05:30

Evil I by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-17T21:04:00.000+05:30

Dissolute by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-17T20:56:00.000+05:30

Shadows by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-17T20:29:00.000+05:30

Flex by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-17T19:44:00.000+05:30

Gnarl by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-17T19:15:00.000+05:30

Swastika by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-16T10:02:00.000+05:30

Homage to Herge II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-16T09:33:00.000+05:30

Profligate II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-15T23:57:00.000+05:30

Dragon by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-15T23:12:00.000+05:30

Sol by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-15T18:35:00.000+05:30

Leitmotif II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-15T09:32:00.000+05:30

Leitmotif by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-15T09:25:00.000+05:30

Evil Eye by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-13T22:37:00.000+05:30

Trails by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-13T22:12:00.000+05:30

Stare by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-13T21:08:00.000+05:30

Fade II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-13T20:14:00.000+05:30

Bleed by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-13T08:25:00.000+05:30

Fade by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Nail In the Coffin : # 36

2007-12-12T22:18:00.000+05:30

Profligate by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-11T22:00:00.000+05:30

Flare II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-11T21:37:00.000+05:30

Weird by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

The name says it all.

2007-12-11T20:56:00.000+05:30

Freeze Flame by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Not pleased with this.

2007-12-10T20:57:00.000+05:30

Trip On by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-10T20:47:00.000+05:30

Faux by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-10T20:23:00.000+05:30

Sensitive by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-10T00:55:00.000+05:30

Signs of Life by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

If you respect only those that appreciate you and your existence then you do not care for much.

2007-12-09T23:05:00.000+05:30

Civilisation by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-09T22:56:00.000+05:30

Flesh and Blood by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-09T22:46:00.000+05:30

Six Degrees II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-09T19:56:00.000+05:30

Mosaic by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-09T19:43:00.000+05:30

Six Degrees ... by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-09T09:33:00.000+05:30

Electric Ladyland by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Straight lines that create curves do hold a certain fascination ...

2007-12-08T13:31:00.000+05:30

Spider Web by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Seth Lloyd's Programming the Universe is highly recommended. It eases the mind by giving reason to intuition ...

2007-12-08T09:14:00.000+05:30

Spiral Wings by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

I just like the way the winged curves spiral inwards ... or outwards, if you so like. There are spirals within spirals ...

2007-12-06T19:38:00.000+05:30

Delusions of Grandeur by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

Standard Issue Fractal

2007-12-06T19:36:00.000+05:30

In_Out by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

I rather like this one ...

2007-12-06T19:30:00.000+05:30

Unravelling by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-05T17:40:00.000+05:30

I Suspect

... that all problems engender themselves when you begin to think that you have something of value / are something to be valued ... The funny thing is that your intrinsic worth goes up the more you devalue yourself.

Interstellar Overdrive by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-04T20:44:00.000+05:30

Purple Dreams by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

~ Playing : Bombay Lounge

2007-12-04T20:28:00.000+05:30

In The End by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

And to think that it all spirals back into the beginning and so it is.

2007-12-04T18:50:00.000+05:30

Is It That? ...

... you tend to lose depth as you gain breadth of perspective? And who is to say which is more valuable? And when? To stay where you have both .... would be an impossibility. No? Or would it be just highly improbable? And then we realise ... that.

Of Hell by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-04T08:24:00.000+05:30

Tsunami by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

An attempt to render this at maximum iterations and size was to last thirty-six hours. Lost the render at twenty-nine. Now at a thousand iterations and nine hours ...

2007-12-01T12:25:00.000+05:30

Wake by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-12-01T08:05:00.000+05:30

Dog Eat Dog by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-11-30T17:31:00.000+05:30

Apache by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-11-24T09:21:00.000+05:30

Croma by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-11-17T17:11:00.000+05:30

Sitting on the Fence ...

... extends the view on either side.

2007-11-17T09:00:00.000+05:30

Beat Signs

Slither from Breathing Under Water is a brilliant bit of musicianship and creativity. Also recommended is what you get to see here ...

~ Discovering the Asian Dub Foundation, MIDIval Punditz, Karsh Kale ...

2007-11-15T09:21:00.000+05:30

Odd

Just wondering about how it is possible that only one species, amongst innumerable others, has managed to evolve to take control of the planet, eliminating all competition. I mean, there ought to be a few more - No? Did we kill off the rest? Eventually ...

Shards II by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-11-12T20:15:00.000+05:30

Intricacy by ~astigmatix on deviant ART

2007-11-11T20:44:00.000+05:30

Addictive

Addictive by ~astigmatix on deviant ART